Review: Humboldt Distillery Humboldt’s Finest Hemp Vodka

Humboldts Finest April2016

Humboldt’s finest? We’re talking about redwood trees, amirite people? OK then, we’re really talking about cannabis sativa, good old hemp seed, and here’s another entry into the burgeoning market of hemp-flavored (and THC-free, of course) vodka.

There’s no real production info here, except that the vodka includes natural flavors and, oddly, certified color (it is tinted just the barest shade of green).

Many a hemp vodka can be an overbearing, hoary experience, but Humboldt’s is very, very mild. The nose offers notes of lime, lemongrass, and a little white sugar, but is otherwise straightforward. The palate is again quite light, slightly sweet with gentle herbal notes, plus hints of banana, orange peel, chicory, and a lightly earthy, cinnamon-dusted finish. It’s all very innocuous, and not at all bad, though there’s nothing here that even remotely recalls “hemp” in any of its incarnations, should you be looking for that skunky funk to get your Friday night started.

But don’t let that stop you. Humboldt suggests using this spirit as a substitute for gin in your favorite cocktail. That’s a fine idea, but it’s so mild that I’d take it one step further and suggest trying it in place of any old vodka, too.

80 proof.

B+ / $30 /

Review: Smithworks American Made Vodka


“From the heartland,” the bottle boldly proclaims. Water from Lake Fort Smith, grain (corn) from Kansas, Missouri, and Oklahoma. Triple distilled in Kansas, bottled in Fort Smith, Arkansas. And Blake Shelton is the brand’s spokesperson.

So yeah, that’s some heartland stuff right there.

I’m happy to report that the heartland acquits itself admirably with this production. The vodka is solid stuff.

The nose is clean, offering lightly medicinal notes and a modest charcoal undercurrent. While lightly sweet on the palate, Smithworks keeps the sugar in check and lets some other elements shine on the body, including florals and quite a bit of fruit: a light dusting of cherries, red apples, and a hint of rhubarb. The finish is clean, again a touch sweet but on the whole working well with those light fruit elements.

All told it’s a versatile vodka, and one you can feel proud of pouring into your punch on the Fourth of July, dad gummit!

A- / $16 /

Review: Blue Ice Creme Brulee Vodka

Blue Ice Creme Brulee

Outside of its “G” line, Blue Ice has just one flavored vodka, and that flavor is… no, not lemon. Not citrus. Creme brulee. Or, as it is listed on the Blue Ice website: Creme burlee. Or, elsewhere, Creme burele.

That is an extremely weird choice for one’s sole flavor, but to be sure, “creme brulee” is shorthand for “vanilla.” (More “natural” flavors are relegated to the Blue Ice “G” line, which has a more organic reputation.) Anyway, if you think about an actual creme brulee while you’re sniffing a glass of Blue Ice Creme Brulee, you really do get a real custard sense in it. It’s not just straight vanilla, but sugary and eggy all at once, complete with that caramelized crust. So, on that note, well done, Blue Ice.

On the palate, sugar dominates, but the flavors continue the theme established by the nose. The more raw elements of the vodka battle with the heavier flavoring elements, but the finish positively pours on the sweetness, sticking to your mouth and, well, anything else that might come into contact with the vodka: This is some sticky, sticky stuff.

Sure, this is hardly a nuanced spirit, and outside of novelty cocktails Blue Ice Creme Brulee doesn’t have a whole lot of utility, but let’s be frank: Once in awhile, everyone’s mom comes to visit. And she’s gonna love it in her coffee.

Now let’s work on that spelling.

60 proof.

B- / $16 /

Review: Elation Hemp Flavored Vodka

elation vodka

Switzerland is the unlikely source for this vodka, triple distilled from wheat and rye and then flavored with hemp before being bottled. The company says it’s the “first established hemp flavored vodka (0% THC) to be sold throughout the United States,” but I’m not going to even begin to try to fact-check that. Elation admits that other hemp vodkas exist, but says its is different: “While other hemp vodkas use hemp seeds, Elation uses blossoms from the finest Swiss hemp to flavor the vodka.”

The nose certainly screams hemp, carefully riding that line between hops and skunk spray, between tobacco and salty licorice. The palate offers a touch of instant sweetness, but this is quickly chased away by the hemp notes that the nose provides. Slightly vegetal, slightly smoky, the finish reminds me of smoked kippers, iodine, and burning leaves.

It’s interesting enough to offer enough to at least merit a peek. Ultimately, I could take it or leave it — though it does offer some curious cocktailing possibilities.

80 proof.

B / $30 /

Review: Purity Vodka

purity vodka 2

So a funny story about Purity Vodka. I was all set to review Purity in 2010, and then the sample bottle disappeared. My housekeeper stole it, a testament to how pretty the bottle is. I ended up firing her, and forgot all about the Purity review… until now, when at last a new bottle of Purity has appeared on my doorstep, at last ready to review. My current housekeeper doesn’t drink, so this bottle survived unscathed.

Purity hails from Sweden, where its claim to fame is being column distilled 34 times. Those numbers don’t mean a lot in column stills, which tend to be continuous, but you get the idea. Purity, made from a mash of organic winter wheat and malted barley, is supposed to be pure — as neutral as vodka can get. Bottles are numbered and identified by batch.

Purity certainly lives up to its promises. The nose is very slight, with gentle hospital notes touched lightly with sugar, marzipan, and a touch of herbs. The palate is very clean, sweeter by a hair than the nose would indicate, with notes of lemon peel and some macadamia nut notes. The finish stays on the ultralight track, adding some vanilla to the mix.

Final analysis: As vodka goes, it couldn’t be an easier sipper and works easily as a versatile mixing ingredient.

80 proof. Reviewed: Batch #87.

A- / $28 /

Review: VDKA 6100 Vodka

Here’s the bullet points on VDKA 6100. It hails from New Zealand (the 6100 refers to the 6,100 miles from the U.S. (where the vodka was envisioned) to NZ, where it is made). It is triple distilled from a mash made not using potatoes, corn, or wheat but from whey — yes, whey, the by-product of milk production. Finally: Robert de Niro is an investor in the product, and “helped with the design, packaging, branding, and positioning of the product.”

The vodka is one of the lightest out there. The nose is lightly sweet, with just a mild touch of hospital character, but otherwise very clean and very neutral. The palate follows suit: Thin, almost watery at times, with very gentle notes of simple syrup, fresh cream, and a touch of lemongrass. Is the whey-cream connection all in my head? At times the vodka seems like it drinks a bit like melted vanilla ice cream.

The use of whey as a base for vodka has been getting a terrible rap in the press, and if you’re looking for a spirit with power and character, I can see why one would complain. This is vodka lite, with all the connotations that entails. For those looking for a truly neutral base spirit that can blend in with whatever mixers you throw at it, well, here it is.

80 proof. Aka VDKA6100.

B+ / $25 /

Review: Stolichnaya Gluten Free Vodka

Stoli Gluten Free

At the risk of angering my gluten-free readership even further, I’m about to review another gluten-free beverage that’s arriving in the form of Stoli Gluten Free.

It’s becoming increasingly popular for manufacturers to claim that various liquor products are gluten free, but it’s commonly known that gluten does not survive the distillation process. By and large (so they say), all distilled spirits are gluten free, unless they are flavored with some kind of gluten-containing product.

The catch: That fact doesn’t actually matter. Per the TTB, you can’t put “gluten free” on your label unless the product was made from start to finish with gluten-free ingredients. Distill from wheat and you can’t claim the product is gluten-free… even if it actually is gluten-free due to the processing.

For Stolichnaya, that’s a problem, because its standard bottling is made from a mash of wheat and rye. Rather than reformulate the original product just to please a few anti-glutenites, it’s launched a whole new version of Stoli: Stolichnaya Gluten Free. Made from a mash of 88% corn and 12% buckwheat, it’s gluten-free right from the start.

Nosing Stoli GF doesn’t indicate anything out of the ordinary. It’s sharp and moderately medicinal, classically Old World in its aroma, with hints of black pepper and pine needles. On the palate, the vodka doesn’t depart much from the expected profile: Hospital notes first, followed by very mild sweetness, a hint of cracked grains, and a bit of a charcoal note on the back end. It’s a very neutral vodka without much in the way of secondary aromas or flavors, its quite crisp finish further ensuring than any additional flavor notes that did survive distillation and filtering are quickly whisked away.

The bottom line: Whether or not you buy in to the gluten-free craze, Stoli’s figured out how to make a “completely” gluten-free vodka that tastes just as good as the “real” stuff. Feel free to sub it in freely for any other top shelf vodka.

80 proof.

A- / $17 /