Category Archives: Rated C-

Review: Master of Malt Single Cask Scotch Whisky Collection

Master of Malt is a whisky and spirits merchant, and it’s also making its own line of spirits from privately bottled single malt scotches from all over Scotland — including at least one I’d never even heard of before. We sampled a solid five of these offerings, with results all over the proverbial map.

Master of Malt M’Orkney 11 Years Old – Good honey character, with strong sherry notes laced throughout and a touch of smokiness, too. There’s a touch of bitterness in the mix that makes things a little unbalanced, but a vanilla note that comes back in the end makes it all worthwhile. 80 proof. B+ / $58

Master of Malt Arran 12 Years Old – Something funky about this one, and not in a good way. Ultra-briny, with a kind of citrus peel (grapefruit?) overtone. Diesel fuel in the nose and the body, with a hard finish. This is a wild experience that you’ll either love or hate. I’m not a big fan. 80 proof. C- / $75

Master of Malt Tamnavulin 16 Years Old – Good lord, this is something unusual and totally off the wall, and not in a good way, with a kind of burnt wood-meets-raw alcohol body. Deadly finish with a distinct unpleasantness. Not a fan. 110.2 proof. D / $100

Master of Malt Tomantin Cask Strength 19 Years Old – Something more traditional, though not expected, with a huge briny character, peat smoke, and, curiously, a little cocoa powder on the back end. A connoisseur’s whisky, it’s complicated and big, with a huge finish. Worth a try, but be prepared to be a bit flummoxed by its intricacies. 115.2 proof.  B+ / $115

Master of Malt Bowmore 26 Years Old – Huge with smoke and wood character, it needs water to make it accessible. 26 years in oak have given this whisky a big honey backbone, with some flowery notes in there, too. The finish is surprisingly short, but it’s definitely worthwhile. 106.8 proof. B+ / $165

masterofmalt.com

master of malt collection Review: Master of Malt Single Cask Scotch Whisky Collection

2009 Beaujolais Nouveau Arrives

November means Beaujolais Nouveau, and, as usual, the first Beaujolais through the door is Georges DuBoeuf’s two bottlings, the standard Beaujolais Nouveau and the more sophisticated Beaujolais-Villages Nouveau.

I tried both, with curious results.

First up is the 2009 Georges DuBoeuf Beaujolais Nouveau, the entry level expression and a rather crude wine, to be honest. Embarrassingly young, it’s more grape juice than wine, a blatantly jammy and far too fruity wine for drinking much of. C- / $10

The 2009 Beaujolais-Villages Nouveau is a more sophisticated wine, with the sweetness toned down but still plenty tart. This is a better choice for your Thanksgiving table or other holiday drinking experiences, big with Bing cherries but also bearing a touch of earth and balanced herbaciousness — and only a buck more expensive. B / $11

duboeuf.com

2009 Georges DuBoeuf Beaujolais Nouveau 2009 Beaujolais Nouveau Arrives

Tasting Report: Pol Roger Champagne Lineup

Had the chance to taste all seven current varieties of Pol Roger Champagne, a brand which dates back to 1849. Old Pol should need no further introduction, of course… here are some thoughts on the house’s current lineup.

2000 Pol Roger Brut Rose Champagne / $115 / A- / yeasty but otherwise quite pleasant

1999 Pol Roger Brut Blanc de Blancs Champagne / $129 / A- / very easygoing

1999 Pol Roger Brut Vintage Champagne / $103 / B+ / similar to the Blanc de Blancs, but a little strange on the finish

NV Pol Roger Brut Reserve “White Foil” Champagne / $55 / B / harmless, fit for “daily” drinking

NV Pol Roger Pure Brut Champagne / $72 / B / extremely creamy, but unbalanced

NV Pol Roger Rich Champagne / $64 / C- / takes the Pure recipe and adds loads of sugar to push into demi-sec/sec territory; yeast-infused and unpleasant

1998 Pol Roger Cuvee Sir Winston Churchill Champagne / $259 / A- / rightfully earns the Pol Roger top spot, with a huge mouthfeel and the best expression of fruit in the lineup, but not that much better than, say, the Blanc de Blancs

polroger.com

pol roger champagne Tasting Report: Pol Roger Champagne Lineup

Review: Brugo Travel Mug

By now every urban legend fanatic knows what a deadly menace too-hot coffee can be. Between the scorched privates and scaled tongues, it’s a miracle anyone drinks this stuff at all.

How do you get your coffee down to a tolerable temperature without it getting too cold? Brugo’s answer is an elaborate travel mug with a unique lid.

Tighten on the custom lid and turn the dial to “tip and cool” then rock the cup back and forth a bit. The coffee (or tea, or whatnot) fills a special channel in the lid designed to quickly cool the drink. You then drink it normally through the usual sippy-cup-style opening.

If that leaves you with too chilly a drink you can always bypass the channel with the “sip” setting and get full-temperature, scalding-hot coffee.

Brugo sounds great in theory but it’s asking an awful lot of a caffeine-deprived sleepyhead at 8 in the morning. Filling the channel with the rocking motion just the right way is the hard part, especially since you have to do that with every sip you take. If you’re like me, you either get no coffee in the sip channel, or you shake it so hard it flies out all over your hand. And it’s still hot when that happens, folks.

Nice idea, but the execution is too tricky, especially while you’re driving. Works fine, though, if you just use the regular “sip” setting… provided you can actually get the lid off…

Available in about a dozen colors. Holds 16 oz. in an ergonomic chassis.

C- / $20 / brugomug.com

brugo Review: Brugo Travel Mug

Review: Tribeca Light Pre-Mixed Cocktails

Pre-mixed, bottled cocktails that include alcohol continue to make a splash. Tribeca Light’s tactic: Do it all with a low-calorie approach; the label promises that a glass of a Tribeca-tail packs just half the calories of a standard cocktail.

Naturally, some sacrifices may be in order… the promise of a “sophisticated taste in a natural juice malt cocktail” is certainly not the most enticing come-on I’ve ever received, and Tribeca’s faux-deco, ’80s-styled packaging doesn’t really prepare one for the top shelf, either.

Tribeca Light premix cocktails Review: Tribeca Light Pre Mixed CocktailsUltimately what we have here is a malt beverage in the Smirnoff Ice mode, one created with natural juices… plus artificial colors and artificial sweetener. Tribeca Light mixes proudly proclaim they contain alcohol, but at 10.2% alcohol each, they don’t contain much…

Three flavors are now being introduced. Here are thoughts on the full lineup.

Tribeca Light Mojito packs a lot of lime in, and just a little mint kick. The malt-bev base isn’t easy to miss, with that boozy kind of finish that comes off as bulkish. The sweetener, though, is the problem. It’s probably sucralose, with that overpowering saccharine aftertaste that the stuff always leaves in your mouth. B-

Tribeca Light Margarita tastes little like a freshly-made margarita. If you’re a fan of super-sweet margarita mix with a little splash of booze in it, well, you’ll love Tribeca Light’s rendition. C-

Tribeca Light Pomegranate Martini is a close approximation of what you’d get if you mixed cough syrup and Zima together and let it go flat. Mmmmm…. D

pricing TBD / tribecalight.com

Review: Three Old Williams & Humbert Rare Sherries

I’ve said before that I am not much of a sherry drinker, but seriously, Harvey’s Bristol Cream is about the only sherry that America knows: You even see it on the dessert wine list at some of the finest restaurants… despite the fact that you can nab a bottle for about 12 bucks.

Following up its 15-year Dry Sack Oloroso, Williams & Humbert offers these three new sherry bottlings, all well-aged and intriguing, and each quite different.

Don Guido Rare Old Sweet Solera Especial Pedro Ximenez, aged 20 years, is as thick and dark as black coffee. Nutty on the nose, it’s intensely raisiny on the palate and could easily pass for an old tawny Port. Not a lot of complexity here, to be honest. It’s a solid punch of raisin character sprinkled with wood notes, but a little cloying in its sweetness. (Not that I should be surprised — it says so right on the label.) 18% alcohol. B / $50

Dos Cortados Rare Old Palo Cortado Especial, aged 20 years, is frankly not my kind of sherry. Burnt golden in color, it has a promising and young nose, fragrant with wood and vanilla and raisiny Port-like character. But the body is nothing at all like that, surprisingly astringent and quite rustic, with a very dry, vegetal character. Hard to get past a few sips of this one. Maybe more up your alley if you’re into drier dessert wines; the company intriguingly suggests using it as a cocktail ingredient. 19.5% alcohol. C- / $50

Jalifa Rare Old Amontillado Solera Especial, aged 30 years, is the age king of this roundup, and it shares a lot of its DNA with the Dos Cortados. The color is similar to the Dos Cortados, but with a comparably muted nose, the lightest of this roundup. Again, this sherry is extremely dry, with a nutty body but a lingering acidity that borders on medicinal. Built for fans of the dry dessert stuff. 20.5% alcohol. C / $70

williams-humbert.com

Review: pro-mis-Q-ous Wines

promisqous wine 126x300 Review: pro mis Q ous WinesThis new value label is hitting the market, hoping to entice consumers with good wine at very affordable prices. We tried two of the three bottles being sold. Here’s how they stack up. All three are non-vintage bottlings and source fruit from all over California. Expect to pay $11 to $13 for a bottle.

promisQous Pinot Grigio – The only named varietal in the promisQous stable, this is not a big success. Rough, rustic, and overwhelmingly tart, it lacks much in the way of structure. Still, it’s far more palatable with food: Try a spicy meal which can temper this wine’s unruly nature. (There’s also a White blend, which we’ve yet to review.) C-

promisQous Red - This blend of zinfandel, merlot, cabernet sauvignon, and syrah is a bit of a mutt, but it’s a bit more of a success than the Pinot Grigio. With all those grapes you’d think this red would be a complicated beast, but it’s surprisingly simple. A palatable wine in its own way, it’s dominated by herbal character and a good slug of fruit, but it’s hardly going to knock anyone’s socks off. B-

Also note the common misspelling of this wine as “promisQuous” (and probably a number of other spellings, too).

www.promisqous.com

Review: Marti Autentico Dorado Especial Rum

marti autentico dorado especial Review: Marti Autentico Dorado Especial RumMarti is best known for a flavored, green-tinted “Mojito” rum that’s available reasonably widely across the country. (The company also has a coconut-flavored rum too, which I’ve never seen for sale.) This is Marti’s first non-flavored product, a traditional aged rum (sans official age statement), which the company labels as “Cuban-style, ultra premium rum.”

It certainly doesn’t taste like any Cuban rum I’ve ever had, but I can see what they were going for at least. Havana Club has a woody, charred, cachaca-like character too it, but Marti is overwhelming with rubber notes and a taste I’ve only been able to describe — after several weeks of sampling it — as akin to pine trees. There’s a strong amount of wood smoke here, but combined with that huge amount of rubber character, it comes across more like a tire fire than anything else.

Sourced from the West Indies (not further specified). 84.8 proof.

C- / $20 / chathamimports.com

Review: Djabel and Green Fairy Absinthe

Admiral Imports, which is bringing the incredibly controversial (based on the comments on this review, at least) Koruna Absinthe to the U.S. market, isn’t just quitting with one. It’s also bringing these two absinthes — Djabel and Green Fairy, both also from the Czech Republic — to the States.

green fairy absinthe 150x300 Review: Djabel and Green Fairy AbsintheI’m lumping these two reviews together because Djabel (Czech for “devil” — also note some sources spell this product as “Djable”) and Green Fairy are pretty obviously close siblings. They use the same bottle. The labels are strikingly similar in design. The color is nearly the same — Djabel is a tiny bit darker — and both rely heavily on artificial coloration. The only obvious difference to the outside observer is the alcohol content: Green Fairy is 120 proof, while Djabel is a racier 140 proof. (Djabel is, somewhat expectedly, also $5 more expensive per bottle.)

And how do they taste? Without water, they both come across like unadulterated firewater — though Djabel is far stronger than Green Fairy thanks to that 10 percent bonus alcohol kick.

Add sugar and water and, like Koruna, neither louches at all, leaving you with a Scope-looking concoction that you can see straight through. The Djabel is again a little darker in hue, but otherwise they’re impossible to distinguish from one another.

The flavor? Very light and mild, minimally sweet (though saccharine in character), and barely flavored with licorice. Djabel has a slightly more herbal character — think cloves and allspice — but it lends an astringency to the drink where Green Fairy comes across as sweeter. Again, in the case of both absinthes (and I’ll let the absinthe geeks bicker in the comments over whether either spirit is truly absinthe at all), they’re very mild and mostly harmless experiences. And that’s really the problem: They’re drinkable, but just not very interesting. Whether you prefer a deeply anise-flavored absinthe or a more approachable, sweeter version, either way you’re going to be disappointed with these two spirits. Provocative labels aside, you can think of them both as the lite beers of the absinthe world.

Green Fairy: C / $59
Djabel: C- / $64

greenfairy.com.au

djabel absinthe Review: Djabel and Green Fairy Absinthe

Review: 2006 Brotte Chateauneuf-du-Pape

What an amazing disappointment this wine was, as Brotte has a solid reputation in the Rhone valley of France.

Weedy, gamy, and redolent of Port-like character, I had immense trouble drinking Brotte’s Chateauneuf-du-Pape (primarily a grenache-based wine), either on its own or with a big, traditional French meal. Nothing could cut through this Chateauneuf’s funk.

I don’t believe it was corked or a bad bottle, but would happily try it again (on someone else’s dime) just to be certain.

Note: This wine may possibly be for the U.S. market only and isn’t reflected on Brotte’s website below. Blanc bottle is pictured below but the label is the same as the rouge.

C- / about $30 / brotte.com

brotte chateauneuf du pape Review: 2006 Brotte Chateauneuf du Pape

Review: Love Potion #9 Liqueur

One way to sell your product is to tout its ancient recipe, artisan craftsmanship, and so on. Another way is to tell the world how long it took you devise the concoction.

In the case of Love Potion #9, the company notes that “almost 1,800 trial-and-error formulations [were experimented with] before its blend of 20 exotic tropical fruit flavors, including mango, peach, chocolate, vanilla, pear, apple, cherry, almond and many others, was perfected.”

Sad then that after nearly 2,000 attempts, this is what they ended up with. (The story gets twistier, though as it turns out this all dates back to 1994; the concoction has been sold under another name, Espiritu del Ecuador, on three continents for years.)

Love Potion #9 — due for release in the U.S. in May — is one helluva spirit. Whiskey-orange/light-brown in color, it looks like it’ll be light but the nose immediately lets on that it’s far more complicated than that. The aroma is powerful, and one sip amps that power up: Thickly syrupy, the cherry flavor is the strongest — a kind of cough drop cherry — with lower levels of vanilla and almond being the most prominent additional flavors here. The overall effect reminds one not of love but of medicine, as it’s all awfully artificial tasting.

At 60 proof and based on cane spirits, it’s at least got a good pedigree to start with, but LP#9 needs to go back to the drawing board with a more natural approach to flavoring this stuff if they want to be a hit in the U.S., where the overwhelming sweetness and chemical aftertaste is likely to put off many who get more than a drop of it in their drink. I can see this working as a mixer — in extreme moderation — but woe to ye who attempts to drink this straight.

Why no photo? Packaging hasn’t been set. But if it’s anything like the manufacturer’s other U.S. product…

C- / pricing TBD / thespiritofliberty.com

Review: Larvets Original Worm Snax

I’m only including Larvets here as a “bar food” because of the possibility they will come up as a bar bet: Will you eat something that lists “larva” as its first ingredient?

Rest assured, these mealworms are long-dead, dried, and utterly flavorless. Even the addition of cheddar cheese flavoring (there are also BBQ and Mexican spice flavors available) and MSG does little to make Larvets taste like anything. They’re crunchy, a bit like a rice cracker, but really, wholly harmless.

Someone slaps a box of these down on the bar and lays down a gastronomic challenge, feel free to take them up on this one. Just cringe along the way as you crunch down on the suckers — you know, for effect. You gotta earn those bar bets, even the easy ones.

C- / $1.85 for 5.6-gram box

larvets worm snax Review: Larvets Original Worm Snax

Review: Four Skyy Infusions Flavored Vodkas

Skyy is a big player in the flavored vodka market and is unique for its dedication to only using natural flavors in its concoctions. After raving about its passion fruit version, I tasted four of its classic, more versatile flavors to get a better feel for the line. All are 70 proof. Some thoughts follow.

Skyy Citrus – This is a very light flavored vodka, much like the effect of dropping a wheel of orange into a tall glass of water. The flavor is brisk and predominantly orange. Great with a cosmo or any other time you want a hint of orange flavor without overpowering the drink. A-

Skyy Raspberry – Sounds like a winner, but in cocktails it invariably forces the flavor toward something strikingly like cough syrup. No better on its own, this one just doesn’t taste like raspberry. Perhaps a different fruit source is in order. C-

Skyy Grape – The perfect essence of grape… Kool-Aid. Tastes like melted Jello shots. That’s not a bad thing — though it brings back all kinds of memories of wasted youth — but it’s not like eating Concord grapes by the bunch. B

Skyy Cherry – There are so many good ways to get cherry flavor into a drink (Heering, Maraschino liqueur, Kirsch), that a cherry vodka seems a little superfluous… though I guess the same can be said of orange flavor. Cherry suffers from the same cough syrup character as the raspberry, but not so severely. There’s a good cherry character here, but then it fades back into medicine. Hit-and-miss. Better in cocktails. C+

all $15 / skyy.com

skyy vodka infusions family Review: Four Skyy Infusions Flavored Vodkas

Review: Glayva Liqueur

Hardly a household name, Glayva’s another spin on sweetened-Scotch-as-liqueur, much like Drambuie.

Sorry, did I say “sweetened?” The 70-proof Glayva is damn sweet. Dripping with honey, cloves, and cinnamon, you could put this on French toast if you wanted. It’s quite overpowering on its own when served on the rocks, even as the ice starts to melt and water it down.

I tried it with some of Glayva’s recommended recipes (including an unexpected Glayva and cranberry juice) and, wouldn’t you know it, it’s still too sweet.

Try it if you’re an aficionado of this curious segment of liqueurs, but use sparingly.

C- / $40 / glayva.com

glayva liqueur Review: Glayva Liqueur

Review: Mascarade Liqueur

On paper, Mascarade sounds pretty interesting, as fruity mixers go, I mean: Peaches and apricots from France, Armagnac, and vodka. Not sure about mixing Armagnac and vodka but, sure, maybe this is just the upscale alternative to Southern Comfort that the market needed.

I wish it was so. Mascarade just didn’t work for me.

On its own, Mascarade is distinctly cough syrupy. Seriously, I swear I’ve had cough syrup with this very flavor. Now maybe that’s a complement to cough syrup — I can drink that stuff all day when I’ve got a bad cold — but I can’t imagine that’s a flavor too many people are looking for in a spirit. Sure, peach and apricot are there, but they just don’t provide the real punch of fruit that I’d have liked.

Mascarade (just 32 proof) fares better in cocktails, but not by much. The
stuff overpowers anything it touches. I tried making the “Mascarade Martini” (1 oz. Mascarade, 1 oz. vodka, 2 oz. orange juice) and expected a more complex Screwdriver. What I got instead was the strong taste of Mascarade cut with a little orange. Mascarade might be fine in tiny quantities, but you probably wouldn’t even notice it was there… and then what would be the point? Considering it has to be refrigerated after opening, one bottle could last an eternity.

Just found this one… If you happen to have mangosteen fruit, mango juice, lime, and gin, the Penang Angel might be something tasty. Now where to get some mangosteen…

C- / $26 / web

mascarade Review: Mascarade Liqueur

Review: Oak Leaf’s $1.97 Chardonnay and Merlot

How good can something cheap really be? When last I broached this topic I found there was some correlation between wine prices and quality, but that it was fairly weak. But that analysis doesn’t really apply to the rock-bottom pricing that rules the world of jug wines, box wines, and stuff like Oak Leaf, a new label of “Extreme Value Wines” (their words), which sell in California Wal-Marts for $1.97 a bottle ($2.97 everywhere else).

By now few are surprised by $2 wine. Two-Buck Chuck (aka Charles Shaw) has been a massive seller in these parts for years. I even know people that swear by it. (I can’t stand the reds but, if forced, I can stomach the whites.) It isn’t surprising that other labels would like to grab a little of Chuck’s market share.

Oak Leaf Vineyards is the latest challenger, and the company’s selling Chardonnay, a Pinot Grigio/Chardonnay blend, Merlot, Cabernet Sauvignon, and White Zinfandel. I tried the Chardonnay and the Merlot (all the wines are non-vintage, with no year specified) just to answer the question: How good (or bad) could this stuff possibly be? (After all, the label has actually won at least four medals at various wine competitions!)

The answer: Surprising, but not in the way I expected. Though “cheap white” is usually a better bet than “cheap red,” the Chardonnay was a miss, lacking much structure at all and reminding me more of the kids’ apple juice that had sat out too long and fermented than of real wine. The punch of alcohol is strong, feeling almost like a fortified wine (or at least a doctored one). I give it a C- at best.

The surprise was the Merlot, which was immeasurably better than the Chard, though still nothing to write home about. An initially decent mouthful of light fruit is palatable, but it ultimately gives way to some bitterness and green, vegetal notes. Again, that punch of raw alcohol, though much slighter here than in the white. It’s passably drinkable in a way that the Chardonnay is not, but it’s hardly something to treasure and hang on to for when you’re grilling a filet mignon. Let’s call it a C+.

Would I go out of my way to pick up a bottle of Oak Leaf? No, but the sheer feat of getting wine into a bottle at retail for 197 cents is nothing short of impressive. I will add that extreme value wines like this do serve one important role in the beverage industry: They expose people who’d otherwise be drinking beer, soda, or something else to wine in a positive way, rather than the overwhelmingly negative one associated with, say, Thunderbird. Oak Leaf, I would hope, might give drinkers a taste for wine… and then encourage them to aim one shelf higher with their next purchase.

oak leaf wines Review: Oak Leafs $1.97 Chardonnay and Merlot

Review: Modmix Organic Cocktail Mixers

Yes, even I am sometimes too lazy to juice a lime… and sometimes pineapple juice and fresh mint is not in the house. While the idea of prepackaged mixers is a little off-putting to most mixologists, the notion of organic ones has a certain appeal. When am I going to get organic pineapple juice or lavender, after all?

Modmix produces five mixers and I’ve given them all a try. Overall I’m impressed. While they aren’t all home runs, I wouldn’t hesitate keeping one or two in the fridge in case of a cocktail emergency. Just drop in a shot of liquor and two shots of mixer (adjust proportions to taste), shake with ice, and you’re good to go with a cocktail you may not otherwise be able to pull off on short notice.

From favorite to least:

French Martini – A nice pineapple, raspberry, and lemon mix. I’d like a bit more pineapple in the blend, but this one tastes like the real thing, and way better than anything made with  canned pineapple juice. A-

Citrus Margarita – Lime and orange, can’t go wrong here. Tastes like a fresh margarita plus OJ. This one is highly dependent on the tequila you put in it, so aim high. A-

Lavender Lemon Drop – The lavender is lost in this one, but otherwise it is a very reliable, if tart, lemon drop. B+

Mojito – Mojitos don’t really work without mint leaves in the glass, no matter how good the mint syrup you use is. Modmix’s is as good as any, but the real thing is still considerably better. B

Pomegranate Cosmopolitan – Don’t ask me how but somehow this mix of pomegranate, orange, and lemon juice smells and tastes a lot like V8. It’s also a rather hideous brown color (the product shot below is a little misleading), making for an all around unpleasant experience. C-

$11 each / modmixbeverages.com

modmix Review: Modmix Organic Cocktail Mixers